Monday, August 02, 2010

Pete and Kaylen's Wedding The Blogpost Part 2: The Hazy Recollections of a Groomsmen/Bullfighter

I think this post might have the longest title of anything I've ever posted. What does that mean for you? Nothing. What does it mean to me? Slightly less than nothing. It's just a bit of trivia. You're welcome.

I think that I should apologize before we get started. Firstly, I'm going to apologize for taking so long to write the follow-up to what is easily my most popular post about Pete and Kaylen's wedding to date. I'm sure many of you were in suspense this entire time waiting to see whether or not Pete and Kaylen would ever get married and whether or not I'd have any more self and other people-deprecating comments and observations to make about said marriage. Sorry about that, and so you don't have to wait any longer, the answers to those questions are yes and yes, respectively. Secondly I'm going to preemptively apologize for how bad this post is going to look. It is my intention to include some of the pictures I took of the events which I took with my i-phone. However, I 'm really terrible at formatting and laying out these blog posts, so the pictures and text might not line up or make sense or it might just look so bad that I scrap the picture idea entirely, either way, again, I apologize. So without further ado: The Wedding!
Saturday Morning...

I was told to meet at Steve's house at noon, so I pretty much had the morning to do with whatever I wanted. I went for a run and then went to a mall to look at boardgames. This was followed by some Lion's Choice, the best roast beef restaurant in the world. Pretty boring stuff really. Cut to-

Saturday Noon...
I got to Steve's house at noon, but when I got there all the other men were tuxed and I was not. I got tuxed then drove myself and Steve to the church. This is still pretty boring. Let's skip to something interesting.
Saturday 12:30ish...

We hung out in the basement of the church before the wedding. Steve and Tim had to help all the men put their boutonnieres on. Steve put Pete's boutonniere on for him. It was adorable. At some point Pete left to go see Kaylen all brided up. He probably cried a bit when that happened because he's kind of a pansy. While he was gone the men continued to not socialize with the bridesmaids.
Saturday 1:00 - 1:45


Pete and Kaylen got married. I stood around and did some walking. There was a reading after the vows that was kind of interesting, but not interesting enough to go into detail about.

Saturday 1:50- like a million hours later...
We took pictures. Boy did we take pictures. There was something that was referred to as a "party bus" that the wedding "party" boarded. It had interesting seating and unorthodox lighting. It was driven by a man named Ace. Ace drove us to places, we would disembark and be photographed. One of the photographers rode the bus with us. I don't remember her name, but it was probably a girl's name (because she was a girl). Anyway, I kind of felt bad for her, because a certain member of the wedding party who I won't name (Pete) kept hitting on her. Anyway, we drove around, got photographed, drove some more, got photographed some more, etc. It really wasn't that bad, I just hate having my picture taken. (The pictures did turn out really well though, due largely in part to me not being in most of them) We got some free frozen custard out of it from Ted Drewes and it gave me occasion to take the following pictures:
















Sat
urday 4:00 or maybe a little later. I don't really remember at this point because it was, like, a month ago...
We got to the reception hall none to soon because, after all those pictures being taken, I was ready to get my drink on. In this case my drink was Coke and Grenadine and, during the reception, I had at least four of them. I was so wasted.

I think everyone who was at Steve's wedding and witnessed Pete's best man "toast" has given him crap for it. It was one of those "from the heart" deals that lasted all of about 30 seconds. So after Pete's toast, the bar for Wissinger Wedding toasts was set pretty low for Steve. Steve could've just spat in the happy couple's faces and it would've been better than Pete's toast. Fortunately (I guess) he decided to go a different route and actually wrote an outline for a toast and delivered it with gusto and glass of hard liquor. After the toast was food and after the food was dancing, I enjoyed the food, but had no part of the dancing, though there was some really good music at the reception (this isn't surprising as Pete and Kaylen have excellent taste in music). Anyway, it all wrapped up around 10pm, after which I went back to Steve and Mary's and had some lovely conversations about whatever it is we talked about, this was followed by some me going to my uncle Kevin's house and some sleeping.

Conclusion... (I'm both showing a
nd telling you that this is the thesis to this post. Take that English classes!)

I'm not a big fan of weddings. I've been to a lot of them, and I can honestly say they are not something I typically enjoy. However, I would say that the two best weddings I've been to have been those of the brothers Wissinger. The fact that these are two of the only non-Southeast Missouri weddings I've been to might be related to how much I enjoyed them, anyway, this wedding was a lot of fun.

Epilogue; Observations...

1. There were so many Arrested Development quotes happening over the course of the weekend, it was unbelievable. The best instance of this was when Steve recited this particular gem (0:52-1:01) while waiting around in the church during the rehearsal

2. After the rehearsal dinner
a party kind of broke out at Steve and Mary's. Somehow a jam session started and one of the songs played during the jam was a little number called "Under the Sea", from the Walt Disney film The Little Mermaid. This was vaguely unsettling to me.

3. Steve Wissinger was a benevolent yet firm best man. We learned early on in the weekend that there was a reason that out of all of us men, he was the best.

4. Other than the Cape/Cairo posse, I talked to Frank more than anyone else, often whilst standing in front of large, wedding reception volume speakers. These conversations were both challenging (from a technical standpoint) and fascinating.

5. Lady Gaga music seems to have some sort of power over girls/gay men. I don't entirely understand why, but I don't think I'm supposed to.

6. This is the second post in a row in which I haven't discussed Scott Pilgrim (although you can bet your ass there's going to be one/some coming in the near future).

7. Formatting those pictures was a huge pain in the ass. There's got to be a better way to do that than how I did it.

8. Pete and Kaylen are the bomb.




1 comment:

Kaylen said...

You're the bomb!

Thanks for writing this :) Also, I hate formatting pictures on the blog. It is a pain. But you did a good job.

Good job, Essner!