Yesterday's Post

I was going to post this yesterday, but I didn't. My computer choked after WOW, and I didn't feel like restarting it.

August 30, 2005
The new recording from the showband Ok Go was released today, so I went to the local merchantile to aqquire it. The merchantile in question I will not name directly for I do not wish to futher sully its already questionable reputation, I will however describe it thusly: This particular establishment claims that to purchase something from them is the best possible act of capitalism one could take part in. Anyway, as a entered the store I was ambushed by 3 of it's employees. "Can I help you with anything?" they all asked in unison. I replied by roundly slapping each of their presumptious mouths and saying; "Yes. You can help me by removing your odious carcasses away from my person, you shiftless gagg-a-bellies." In the wake of the clerks's departures I went about my task of purchasing the new recording. I quickly found the object of my desire, without the help of any petulant shopclerks mind you, and moved to purcahse the goods. As I approached the registers (that's right dear reader such is the dallyment of this merchantile that they feel the need for more than one cash register, oh the credulity of it all) I was assaulted yet again by the clerkery. "I can check you out over here," she said in the manner of someone who frequently says such things without so much as a thought to the consequences of their mouthyness. "I'm sure you could," I replied as I smartly rapped her jaw with my left spat. "That'll be 10 dollars and 69 sense." She groaned as she rang up my tab. I paid her with exact change in the most preditious way possible and quickly left the building, not before, however, I thrashed a good 4 or 5 more of the shopkeeps.

Some of this account is true. I'm not going to tell you which parts fictious and which are genuine. That, dear reader, is for you to determine.