Steve and Mary got married yesterday. The ceremony was small, intimate and very nice. The reception was tasteful and fun. All and all, it was almost a perfect wedding... except for one thing: Pete Wissinger. Whether or not it was a conscious decision, I will never know, but for some reason, Pete Wissinger seemed determined to ruin the magic of Steve and Mary's special day.
It all started with his suit, the coat of which, conspicuously did not match his vest. If that wasn't enough, Pete's coat continued to distract with the all buttons vs. one button fiasco, that raged up until the beginning of the ceremony. During the ceremony, Pete didn't cause too much of a problem, but not for want of trying. His constant standing next to Steve and beard having, was a desperate if not effective plea for attention, the audacity of which was matched only by his loud and vulgar slamming of the ring box during the presentation of the rings.
Having nearly ruined the magic of the wedding ceremony, one would think that Pete would be satisfied, but they would be thinking incorrectly. Pete's campaign to spoil what would otherwise be the happiest day of Steve and Mary's young life together was taken to the next level once the reception began. His "toast" was neither lengthy nor in verse form (unless you count blank, which I can safely say, I don't). Then, for the happy couple's first dance, Pete "couldn't get the sound system to work properly". Of course, Pete's selfish, petty behavior was topped off by his flagrant vest flaunting. Not only was his vest quite dapper, but it also had more buttons on it than Steve's entire ensemble for the evening, breaking the cardinal room of best man attire (that rule being: The best man should have fewer buttons on his person than the groom at all times {not just at the ceremony, but for the rest of their lives}). Of course, Steve took all of Pete's chicanery in stride, as he has for most of their lives together, and by the time I left the reception last night, the brothers were still on speaking terms.
In all seriousness though, it was a really great wedding. Also, in all seriousness, Pete Wissinger is kind of a dick.
2 comments:
BAHAHA. this post is brilliant. i'm so sad i found it only after searching for pete's wedding photos. well written, my friend.
Sounds like it was quite an enjoyable party with the exception of Pete’s antics. But I guess it’s fine since it seems that the wedding ended on a good note. I was also attending my niece’s wedding last week at one of the well-known event venues in our neighborhood and had a lot of fun at the event.
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